The Binge/Restrict Cycle: Rethinking How We Measure Progress
Different eating disorder symptoms come with different forms of stigma - and a boat load of it (source 1). Binge eating disorder is certainly no exception.
Examples of stigma related to binge eating disorder (BED)
We may be more prone to thinking that people with BED can will their way out of binge eating and that the problem is lack of self-control (not even a *little* bit true)
We may assume that someone in a larger body must be struggling with BED, and write off diagnoses like anorexia or bulimia (we cannot deduce anything about anyone’s lifestyle based on their body)
We may regard a certain quantity of food as problematic for one person, and acceptable for another person, based on body size (this is weight stigma)
We may see BED as less serious and less needing of treatment than other eating disorders (all eating disorders are serious and deserve support)
We may find that people getting treatment for BED are more likely to be encouraged to lose weight (weight loss should never ever be a goal a person’s treatment team suggests, ever)
In a culture that normalizes (and praises) restriction and “willpower”, it makes sense that we are often hyper-focused on reducing the binge eating, and less prone to looking at the restriction and emotional needs that are almost always part of the bigger picture of the human’s experience.
And so it may be surprising for someone engaging in binge eating disorder treatment for the first time to find that the support is (hopefully) not focused on “stopping the bingeing”, but rather looking at the needs the binge eating is helping to meet. A person could be doing incredibly healing work for months, and feeling defeated that binges are still happening most nights. But what if SO much is shifting behind the scenes that our eyes aren’t trained to see? We can only come to appreciate that healing when we better understand the cycle.
Let’s bring the binge/restrict cycle to life with a fictitious character, Oscar.
Oscar is in college and feels trapped.
Most nights he binges and is left feeling really uncomfortable - physically, emotionally, and psychologically. He would be mortified if anyone saw the quantity of food he’s eaten, so he hides the containers and wrappers from his roommates. It scares him to feel so out of control, like he’s engaged in something he couldn’t stop if he tried.
Every morning he tells himself he is going to start fresh, be healthy, be disciplined. He tries to get as much movement in as he can, and sticks to smaller meals in case he has another binge that night.
By evening, Oscar is exhausted and finally less busy. With more time to sit and be still, feelings start to creep in that he was too busy to feel fully during the day. He doesn’t have a name for everything he’s feeling, it just feels so big and uncomfortable.
Before he knows it, he is bingeing. Immediately afterward he feels back at square one and disheartened that he can’t break out of this pattern.
First of all, I just want to give Oscar the biggest hug. This is such a tough spot to be in, made even harder by the fact that he is living it all on his own (though he is most definitely NOT alone in his experience).
But back to Oscar. Let’s say he stumbles upon an anti-diet, Health at Every Size podcast like Virginia Sole-Smith’s Burnt Toast or one of Aubrey Gordon’s books, and starts re-thinking everything he thought he knew about binge eating…
A glimpse into Oscar’s binge eating recovery
Oscar begins to entertain the idea that maybe the binges aren’t happening because he lacks discipline - if that were all it took, surely he would be better by now. He begins working with a therapist and realizes that bingeing offers reprieve from the onslaught of uncomfortable emotions that rush in every night. He comes to actually appreciate that his body managed to find a strategy to make the feelings go away, even if just for a little bit (see my post: I thank your eating disorder for its service).
His eyes are opened to the possibility that what he was seeing as “healthy eating” was actually pretty restrictive and is not enough food for his true needs. With the help of a non-diet dietitian, he realizes he subconsciously labels foods as “acceptable” and “only okay in small doses”. He’s never thought of this as a form of deprivation. He also comes to understand that bingeing at night does not mean he needs less food during the day, and that this is another insidious form of restriction (see my post about different forms of deprivation).
A few months into this work, Oscar is feeling a lot more in tune with his body. He’s begun eating more during the day, and eating more of the foods he enjoys. This brings up some really uncomfortable feelings - he’s going against what he believed was healthy eating for years. He reminds himself of the words of Glennon Doyle who says, “We can do hard things & we can choose the kind of hard that works for us.”
He is also learning about the emotions that have felt nebulous and confusing for years. He’s learning to understand them and practice sitting with them. It is painful work, but he is finding that as he learns to tolerate the hard feelings, he is also more in touch with the beautiful, life-giving feelings life has to offer.
Lastly, when he has a binge, he is learning to practice self-compassion. He’s more aware when the soundtrack in his head is caught in an unkind, unhelpful loop. Slowly the soundtrack is becoming a lot gentler and more empathetic.
Here’s the kicker though: all of this deep work is happening AND he is still experiencing binges. His therapist and dietitian remind him that it sometimes takes a long time for the frequency of binges to change, and that he is right where he is meant to be (see my post about the Minnesota Starvation Experiment) .
Final thoughts on bingeing and restricting
When it comes to binge eating, often we are focused on the binge part, and lose sight of the restrictive and emotional parts. I try to avoid speaking in absolutes but of this I feel certain: we cannot work on binge eating without addressing restriction. In a culture that normalizes restriction and scorns bingeing, it makes sense that our focus would be on the latter. But I promise that looking at the bigger picture is not only crucial - it pays dividends in our lives.
For many, there is also an emotional component that deserves support. This too, is something diet culture is less apt to communicate as quickly as it wants to sell you fixes to your binges.
Lastly, if you find yourself caught in the binge/restrict cycle, please know there is absolutely nothing wrong with you. Whether your experience is similar or really different from Oscar’s, you are not alone.
Looking for support? I’m a registered dietitian nutritionist and offer virtual nutrition counselling to adults in Ottawa and the rest of Ontario.
Learn more about my services.
This blog post is not a substitute for personal eating disorder care and is intended for educational purposes only.
Sources:
O'Connor C, McNamara N, O'Hara L, McNicholas M, McNicholas F. How do people with eating disorders experience the stigma associated with their condition? A mixed-methods systematic review. J Ment Health. 2021 Aug;30(4):454-469. doi: 10.1080/09638237.2019.1685081.
